I'd like to give you a little extra background on Nichole and her family:
Nichole’s mom graduated from high school – with honours; she was even enrolled in college (but never had a chance to graduate). She took care of her kids while her husband worked. It was the late 70s.
But papa was a rolling stone. He was in a rock band and drove race cars on the weekends. He thought he was one “hot tamale”! Then, the bottom fell out... He lost his job, lost the house and cheated on his wife. Little Nichole was only 2 when her dad left. A single mom with 3 kids and no income doesn’t make ends meet very well. And, Nichole’s dad was not into paying child support!
Oh, there goes gravity… (Eminem, Lose Yourself)
Nichole’s mom turned to county (State) support. A few food stamps and housing subsidies later, none of which provided a good life for a family of 4 in which 3 of the people were under the age of 18, Nichole’s mom gave into the vices that grip people who begin to feel hopeless. She started smoking and drinking heavily – and Lord knows what else – but, the point is that the pressures were too much!
Nichole’s mom – a grown woman – had to work for minimum wage at the local grocery store. She had a job which did not provide her with any family benefits so she remained a “client of welfare”; she did not get time off – she worked weekends, evenings, and sometimes nights. Nichole, her sister (4 years older), and her brother (8 years older) spent nights alone – fending for themselves. The kids would often wake themselves up and get themselves ready to go to school by themselves because their mom was too tired. Can you understand why, sometimes, the laundry didn’t get done?
The subsidies allowed the family to get a used car – sometimes the car started, sometimes it didn’t. Often, it didn’t start because they couldn't afford gas! (Would you believe that food stamps don’t buy gas, either?) When the car didn’t start, Nichole’s mom couldn’t get to work which meant she didn’t get paid. Oh yeah, I know what you’re thinking: call for a ride, take the bus. I thought that way too – but, let me enlighten you:
When you live in many small towns that are in the suburbs of small cities, there is no public transit! So, that option is out the window. And, when you live in areas where poverty is the norm, reliability is not a trait you find in others very easily. So, you just stay home. It doesn't happen over night; at first, you try. But, over time, when you are continuously met with this kind of challenge and obstacle, it's hard to find the strength to push through.
Shall we recap?
• From a life with hope, to hopeless and alone
• From regular meals to food stamps and housing subsidies
• From stay-at-home mom to minimum wage work with no benefits
• From a nice home to no stability
• From race cars to a car that might not start
• And, no reliable people or public transit
Nichole’s mom graduated from high school – with honours; she was even enrolled in college (but never had a chance to graduate). She took care of her kids while her husband worked. It was the late 70s.
But papa was a rolling stone. He was in a rock band and drove race cars on the weekends. He thought he was one “hot tamale”! Then, the bottom fell out... He lost his job, lost the house and cheated on his wife. Little Nichole was only 2 when her dad left. A single mom with 3 kids and no income doesn’t make ends meet very well. And, Nichole’s dad was not into paying child support!
Oh, there goes gravity… (Eminem, Lose Yourself)
Nichole’s mom turned to county (State) support. A few food stamps and housing subsidies later, none of which provided a good life for a family of 4 in which 3 of the people were under the age of 18, Nichole’s mom gave into the vices that grip people who begin to feel hopeless. She started smoking and drinking heavily – and Lord knows what else – but, the point is that the pressures were too much!
Nichole’s mom – a grown woman – had to work for minimum wage at the local grocery store. She had a job which did not provide her with any family benefits so she remained a “client of welfare”; she did not get time off – she worked weekends, evenings, and sometimes nights. Nichole, her sister (4 years older), and her brother (8 years older) spent nights alone – fending for themselves. The kids would often wake themselves up and get themselves ready to go to school by themselves because their mom was too tired. Can you understand why, sometimes, the laundry didn’t get done?
The subsidies allowed the family to get a used car – sometimes the car started, sometimes it didn’t. Often, it didn’t start because they couldn't afford gas! (Would you believe that food stamps don’t buy gas, either?) When the car didn’t start, Nichole’s mom couldn’t get to work which meant she didn’t get paid. Oh yeah, I know what you’re thinking: call for a ride, take the bus. I thought that way too – but, let me enlighten you:
When you live in many small towns that are in the suburbs of small cities, there is no public transit! So, that option is out the window. And, when you live in areas where poverty is the norm, reliability is not a trait you find in others very easily. So, you just stay home. It doesn't happen over night; at first, you try. But, over time, when you are continuously met with this kind of challenge and obstacle, it's hard to find the strength to push through.
Shall we recap?
• From a life with hope, to hopeless and alone
• From regular meals to food stamps and housing subsidies
• From stay-at-home mom to minimum wage work with no benefits
• From a nice home to no stability
• From race cars to a car that might not start
• And, no reliable people or public transit
Sounds dreamy, doesn’t it? These were the realities that this family lived with… So, it’s no surprise when I tell you that there were often nights when splitting a baked potato for dinner was something you just had to do. Nichole recalls many nights where her mom actually gave up eating so that the kids could get a larger portion. Did I mention that her mom weighs about 90lbs all wet?
What’s the point of this story? The point is that poverty is a cycle. Somewhere, somehow, the cycle has to be broken. Here’s the big challenge: How do you break the cycle of poverty, create value for education, and mitigate the negative influences, without losing the fact that in the middle of it all, there exists a family?
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